Christine Burke Fitness » Alan’s WOW

Alan’s Words of Wisdom: Names on the No-Fly List

Christine Burke — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 02:36:03 +0000

The 7/12/10 issue of Time magazine quotes Santhos Thomas when Thomas learned that his 6-year-old daughter’s name was on the U.S. government’s no-fly list (Verbatim, p. 26). Thomas’s quote was: She may have threatened her sister, but I don’t think that constitutes Homeland Security triggers.

My husband’s sage advice upon hearing this:

Don’t name your kids after terrorists.

Thanks, sweetie. Maybe one of our kids will be a best selling author like Justin Halpern (Sh*t My Dad Says).

Alan’s Words of Wisdom: On Training Cats

Christine Burke — Sat, 02 Jan 2010 05:08:41 +0000

We adopted 2 kitties from FOCAS a few months ago, and I got it in my head to try clicker training them. I had a few false starts, but after a little research on YouTube, I’m getting pretty good results.

One of the super useful things about clicker training is that you can train your pets to calmly get into a carrier or even sit still for a blood draw. Dr. Temple Grandin talks about this in her latest book, Animals Make Us Human. So, I was working on getting the kittens to enter a carrier by themselves, when Alan walked by. He got a very sweet, fond expression on his face, and he smiled and said:

Awww… it’s so cute that you think you’re training them…

Alan Asks for Crossword Help

Christine Burke — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 21:48:30 +0000

My husband, who likes solving crosswords, sometimes asks me for help. Apparently, looking up words in a dictionary and asking your wife for answers is not cheating. Buying a special crossword dictionary or searching Google is.

Today, Alan asked: Do you know the song “The Year of the Cat”?

Me: No.

*pause*

Alan: Do you know who sings it?

Alan’s Words of Wisdom: On The Right Way to Make Dinner

Christine Burke — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 04:47:03 +0000

My husband announced he was making steak for dinner and started making noise in the kitchen. I noticed that he had pulled out our cocktail shaker and a few bottles of liquor. I noted, “That doesn’t look like steak…” He gave me a LOOK and said:

Baby, you clearly don’t understand The Process.

He then went back to “making dinner”, muttering something to the effect that I might enjoy cooking more if I did it right.

Alan’s Words of Wisdom: On Twitter

Christine Burke — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 22:15:51 +0000

This is my husband’s impression of Twitter:

Got one leg in my underwear!
Got the other one in!
Pulling my underwear up now!
Feels good!

Happy anniversary, sweetie! Love you for making me laugh!

Alan’s Words of Wisdom: On Having a House on the Beach

Christine Burke — Wed, 17 Dec 2008 19:09:56 +0000

My husband Alan says the darndest things. Today’s quote (in response to my enthusiasm for beach-front property):

It’s just water that covers 72% of the planet! We should be grateful that we can avoid being in it!